We recently launched The Lynx List section of our newsletter for investors - we profile 1-2 startup pitches from NYC pre-seed and seed founders actively raising
Annie Garofalo knows co-founder dynamics better than most. A former founder herself, she now helps early-stage startup teams navigate conflict through her company, Confidante. (We interviewed Annie a few months ago about the simple rituals that prevent co-founder conflict)
She has worked with hundreds of teams and studied founder relationships at Stanford. One of the most common questions she hears from new founders is, "How do I find a co-founder?" These are the 3 core questions every founder should ask before jumping into a partnership.
1. Why Do You Want a Co-Founder?
Do not start with what investors expect. Start with what you want. If your answer is “because investors like to see it,” that is not deep enough. Instead, ask yourself:
Am I motivated by wealth or by control?
If you thrive as the sole decision-maker and prefer full control, you might be better off as a solo founder. That is a legitimate story to tell investors. But if you thrive in teams, do not need full control, and want someone to share the journey with, it might be time to look for a partner.
2. What Are You Looking for in a Co-Founder?
Most people focus on functional skills, such as finding a technical partner if they are on the business side. But you should also consider social and emotional fit.
Functional: Do their skills complement yours?
Social: Do they lead or manage in a way that aligns with your values?
Emotional: Can they be a steady partner during the highs and lows?
These deeper layers are often overlooked but critical. They influence not just who you look for but how you evaluate the partnership.
3. How Should You Go About Finding Them?
Online platforms like Y Combinator’s co-founder match tool or Coffee Space can work, but a more personal approach can be more effective:
Make a list of five people you trust and could imagine co-founding with. Even if they are not interested, ask them for their top five.
That gives you a pool of 25 vetted names, people who are a step closer to what you are looking for.
Once you have connected with a potential partner, do not jump straight in. Instead, test the relationship with a low-stakes trial:
Build a feature together
Host a small event
Take a short weekend work trip
The goal is to see how you each respond to stress. Do your styles complement or clash under pressure?
“A successful outcome does not mean continuing with everyone you try. It is about getting clarity early. Sometimes the best outcome is walking away.”
Final Advice
Do not fall into the scarcity mindset. You do not need a co-founder to start building. If needed, hire a founding engineer or think creatively about your team structure.
With the right mindset and a thoughtful process, you can find the right partner or decide you are better off solo.
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